July 20th, 2009

STOCK: food - blueberries

PUBLIC APOLOGY....a REAL one and not a fake like Chris Brown

I'm sorry if i'm not active. The summer is making me feel really REALLY crappy. i even made myself look like an ass in a graphics community that pretty much kicked me out in a way (1 reason being that i wasn't that active) :( I've not done much but sit here in front of the fan. my room is REALLY hot an i can't sleep anymore. i can't normally function in this weather. the time passes so fast. I've not even gone swimming as much as i should this summer. I can barely sleep. I go to bed around 2am and i wake up a few hours later to pee. and i can't fall back asleep. my back ends up hurting, too. so i just lay there. i get 5 hours at the most these days. i can't sleep in a hot room during the day. i just can't. i try to go to bed as early as possible, but i end up staying up later. :/ So i'm pretty much tired as hell as you could imagine. So i end up not doing anything at all.

THIS IS WHY I PREFER TO BE A NIGHT OWL. i sleep better during the day. i HATE being awake during the day. it SUCKS

So anyway, this summer has treated me like utter shit. i'm NOT having fun. i don't have anyone to talk to really. nothing to do. nowhere to go. :|

so yeah...my mind is a blank. i can't think straight. i just wanna sleep for days and days. too bad i don't have any sleeping pills. i just...can't do it anymore. i want this damn summer to be over with. i just don't care about Arizona. i hate it. AZ can't suck it. thank god it rained earlier tonight. too bad it gets stormy at night. then the stupid hot ass sun comes out during the day. i feel like a damn roast in here.

anyhoo, don't expect me to comment every entry i see. i'm sorry but i don't have the time right now. i'm too tired and i don't feel good. i feel like crying in my pillow right now. and the tears begin.....

SO MUCH PRESSURE!! >:O *sniff*
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